Tween- The most delicate years of your child


Tween, an age that is pure, delicate, and above all needs more attention of any parent. This is when you will notice many changes and multiple additional issues coming up with your child. Like every parent, you also grow each day with your child but these tweens are not your baby girl or baby boy, they assume they are independent but they need you the most.

Wow!! I believe this is the most wonderful stage of life when kids learn and explore answers to unknown questions and there comes the responsibility of parents. A tween is a child whose age lies between 9 years and 12 years. Not a little child and not a teenager.

As they are in between these two beautiful age groups, you will notice tremendous differences and changes in terms of their behavior, emotional, physical, and mental.

7 Challenges faced by Tween

As I mentioned, the genuine challenge starts when kids enter this stage of life as you would be the biggest support system for them. Trust me, for me also this term tween was new and when I researched more, I found myself in the same set of parents who are dealing with this age group.

Call them preteens, middle schoolers, or tween, they themselves will face unconventional kinds of obstacles in these years.

1. Flicker in interest: The biggest change that I found in my girl was a change of interest. The girl who loves to play basketball now just want to go for athletes who never showed a single interest. Switched from singing classes from dance classes and that too classical dance.

2. New Responsibilities: Kids who did nothing alone now will tell you they can do their own stuff. As a parent, I feel happy and proud when she shows her this side, but how much responsibility we should give them and they can handle the need should be monitored.

3. Change in academics: With higher grade comes more studies and homework. Where your little one was just happily doing his/her homework in just 1 hour or two, now have to dedicate more time to studies which will be one of the most common factors where you will feel the difference in actions and attitude.

4. Physical changes: Both your girl and boy will approach their puberty and those physical changes in their body will lead to mood swings, irritation, and anxiety.

5. Friendship goals: Exposure to an unknown world, to new theories and recent friends, these all should be monitored. I remember my mother always mentioned that you become according to your friend circle. It’s important to tell them to be responsible while choosing friends who give you the right advice, bring positivity, and stand by you. Now standing by your friend doesn’t mean stand by in wrong deeds too, this needs to explain very positively.

6. Brain Development: Along with physical and emotional changes, one thing which affects the most and needs to be taken care of is the brain and mental development.

7. Social Challenge: Nowadays, even I see when my daughter plays with kids of her age who all are tween have some set rules and they only consider their friends. They accept friendship with any child who fit in their rules or group rule. This brings up many times the social acceptance challenge among kids.

Now as I mentioned these common 7 challenges faced by your tween, we need to be equally vigilant by doing some common things and make these wonderful years happier and growing!!


Few tips for parents:-

1. Communication: Like I always believe that communication is the basic need of any relationship and in any age. So keep your communication channel always open for your tween too and be available for them at the time of their need.

They might of so much to tell or on the contrary stay quiet and introvert speaking up. Try to make a perfect bridge between where you both can communicate. They should have confidence that their parents are available to hear them out and support them.

2. Command of Language: Now this is the age where they understand all your language and meaning. For them, proverbs or idioms, awful words or anything is more understandable. As a parent, we should watch our words as if they feel that we are just trying to play with words they will surely understand.

3. Leadership: Now when I say this age takes up responsibility, it will automatically bring along leadership. You need to maintain and tell the difference between independent, responsible, and leadership. As my father always told me these three things should handle carefully.

4. Emotional connect: Don’t think your little baby can handle all now as one thing which might be tiny for you, can touch them if not physically. Be available if you feel they are emotionally hurt or even happy.

There might be different milestones for every child but if you find your little one applying logics to situations or problems, starts understanding cause-and-effect sequence, when they tell their point of view and above all understand others too, strongly shows concern about being liked or accepted, these are few checkpoints or milestone of your tween.

These are common factors but there would be a tremendous difference between the mood swings and changes between your girl and a boy tween. Their friendship goals and in dressing. You will notice them enjoying creating their own secret codes and passwords with their friends, and that’s the beauty of this age.

Let them do and allow them some privacy with friends you will notice yourself getting more connected to you and share a special bond as with trust, care, and unconditional love will bring you and your tween connected forever.

Do you have a tween at home? Have you marked any changes in your kid’s behavior you want to share with us? Comment below and share your thoughts and experience.

This post is written with Blogchatter for the #CauseAChatter series.

Β© Ruchie Verma. Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited.

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Author: Ruchi Verma
A multiple Award winner, mother of two active kids believes in sharing the right source of information to readers which could help them in every possible way!!

23 thoughts on “Tween- The most delicate years of your child

  1. Yyyyeeeaaahhhhhhhhhh….I have heard so many people speak of the “times of trouble” starting from here. We have to start watching our language and how commanding it is or can be. Otherwise, we are in for a long ride.

  2. Oh yes. The tween years are delicate and difficult. But kids — and parents — get through it. With some help and lovely advice like this. πŸ™‚

  3. I guess I am lucky I survived that time when my kids were in their tweens. It was a challenge for me with my sons, because they were in their tween years when their father and I parted ways, so I was both mom and dad to them. Thankfully, we survived! They are now grown ups and maybe in a few years they will be ready to start a family of their own.

  4. My nephew is in transitionheading towards teenage years. I see so many changes in him. Already so responsible and thoughtful. Of course there’s a naughty trait too! But where’s the fun without that ?

  5. My elder one is in same stage and I had observed most of these things in her behavior. I think making good communication and emotional connect is one of the most important thing as a parent that helps in making good bond with your kids and create a great foundation for future as well.

  6. I have a tweenager at home. And I am witnessing all these changes in her. It is a challenging age but also adventurous. Now we can talk to them on various topics. As a parent, our horizon also expands

  7. Yes! You are saying right. I am also observing the difference in my daughter’s behaviour. That is the time for opting the right way of communication with the understanding of their mood swings.

  8. Yes….absltly. the tween years are such a
    special year’s for each child. As it is said at this age you need to treat your children as your friend…

  9. I like your pointers but i think watching our language should be done from when they are young itself. So this shouldn’t be something new for them. Of course they will be introduced to new bad words from peers during this time perhaps.. hahaha….

  10. I totally agree that a good communication with your child can solve a lot of troubles. The age is so tender emotionally that a strong support system will be very important.

  11. Tween is a tricky age to handle. Going through it and can see teenage rebellion slowly creeping in. Communication and patience is indeed the key.

  12. I don’t have teen at home but I can easily relate to these changes I come across during teenage. Indeed parents approach plays important role during this period

  13. this phase is indeed the most delicate phase in a child’s life, you need to be very careful during this time

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