Married Women…Are you really blessed?

W  oman, pow­er to run this entire soci­ety nowhere less that men!! 

A wom­an has the pow­er to give birth, can turn 4 walls and give it a place to live and called as HOME, a wom­an can take care of her kids with sleep­less nights, a wom­an can run busi­ness and may be your boss to whom you have just applied for a leave.

When I was young, small, unmar­ried I remem­ber if some­one comes at home and we greet them and take aashir­waad they smile and says ” God bless you!” or “khoob pad­hoo” or “jeete raho” and we all know what does it mean and I used to be hap­py !!

I was lucky that I shared my child­hood with my 3 sis­ters ONLY and I don’t have a broth­er, some­times it hurts also but then I real­ize that today it’s good that I don’t have a broth­er else there would be def­i­nite­ly some argu­ments and fights!!

Now, when I am mar­ried and now I real­ize that this is “MAN Soci­ety” and real­ly pity and sad about how the­se bless­ings also changed !!!

Once a girl is mar­ried, her par­ents does “KANYA DAAN” known as biggest daan in Hin­du mythol­o­gy and moth­er till her life only give good advice to fol­low “SASURAL ke RITUALS” and if in case you as a new­ly mar­ried girl or even have a con­fu­sion call your mom and ask should I do this poo­ja like this … mom’s reply would be “Ask your moth­er in law, do as she said “. So I under­stand why this Kanya daan is maha daan …

Com­ing to the top­ic:
DO YOU REALLY THINK YOU GET BLESSINGS FOR YOURSELF AS A MARRIED WOMAN?

I tried find­ing out what bless­ings we as a wom­an gets and what as men, our hus­bands gets!!

Bless­ings for your beloved hus­bands:

  1. Yashasvi Bhava: (Males only) which means may you attain eter­nal suc­cess with no obsta­cles in the way of achieve­ment.
  2. Vijayi Bhava: (Males only) May you be vic­to­ri­ous.
  3. Tar­raki Karo: (Males Only) May you keep reach­ing goals and be suc­cess­ful.

Bless­ings for you as a Bride/ Bahu/daughter in law:

  1. Saub­hagyawati Bhava/akhand sub­hagyawati bhava (to female only)- May you die before your hus­band and not as a wid­ow
  2. Putra­vati Bhava: (females only) May you have a son
  3. Suman­gali bhava: (females only): Again may you die before your hus­band and not as a wid­ow

Yes, yes, one bless­ing is com­mon for both male and female:

Ayush­man Bhava/ chir-aayu bhava: (To both males & females)may you live a long life

but, this goes off if you have given above bless­ings to a wom­an. bless­ing gen­er­al­ly goes to their hus­bands only if so, how to bless a mar­ried wom­an.

Oth­er than this, all fasts are meant to be kept by a wom­an for “LONG LIFE of hus­band ” like Karwa­cau­th, Teej, vat Sav­it­ri and above all the­se mar­ried wom­en then after get­ting blessed with “Putra­vati Bhava” keep some fasts for their son’s long life !!

So, in short, fast only for the long life of hus­band and son, and still can’t believe we wom­an only doing this … yes!! I know few have bro­ken this and few men start­ed fast­ing for their wives too(but they are ter­med as “uff !! Jooru ka gulam” yes!! those men are real as they feel that their wives have equal rights to be blessed.

I have not kept fast for my son, I love him but because I have not done for my daugh­ter so NO to my son !! and my fast­ing can’t proof that I don’t pray for both of them and bless them every day with healthy and long life !!

WARNING: this post is entire­ly my views, not to hurt anyone’s feel­ing!! I Love my hub­by & kids more than any­thing else but ques­tions yet to answer.. If some­one can please .… 

Share your views in com­ments ” Do you real­ly think the­se Aashir­waad are meant for mar­ried wom­an?

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41 Comments

  1. That’s quite a take on soci­etal rit­u­als!!! I loved the bold head-on take on the­se age old rules of Indi­an Cul­ture & Soci­ety.
    It’s time now to sit back & think does the­se actu­al­ly make sense.

  2. I have done away with all this non­sense and am actu­al­ly tak­ing strict steps to ensure that my own par­ent­ing is gen­der neu­tral. Glad to read views that I whole­heart­ed­ly agree with.

    • Thanks for vis­it­ing here Lata !! Yes I agree and so treat­ing my kids same way no gen­der pref­er­ence both have equal rights for bless­ings and love

  3. You nailed it..so true..all things are direct­ed towards men/husband as if the wom­an or the wife is a lia­bil­i­ty, sit­ting to do all this as penance and an oblig­a­tion.

    • Seri­ous­ly some­times I think par­ents are mak­ing their son to get mar­ried so that some­one fast for them for long life …please too much

  4. Those were the times when the rit­u­als were made with some solid base and con­sid­er­ing the soci­ety that time. Now times have changed and wom­en don’t real­ly need to wor­ry or both­er about who is say­ing what.

  5. I have got recent­ly mar­ried and also from my per­son­al belief and expe­ri­ence, I think slow and steady but the change is com­ing, not just equal­i­ty and respect but in the per­cep­tion of males. Drop by drop, it will be a world where we won’t have such more ques­tions. 🙂

    • Mar­riage is a won­der­ful expe­ri­ence !!! I only ques­tion about the­se so called bless­ings .. but but but Ash­wini be ready for more such self-iden­ti­ty ques­tions com­ing in down d line 🙂 Once again Wish­ing u rock­ing mar­ried life 🙂

  6. I so agree with this post, Ruchie. Even I had same ques­tions in my mind. BTW, I am blessed to have a hus­band who prays & fasts for his wife on Karwachau­th. 🙂

    • Thanks for vis­it­ing here Neha !!! Yes, the­se are few ques­tion which i think every wom­an must have thought some day or oth­er …few just accepts it ..few like us just take our heart ou and speak …I am not again­st bless­ings firm believ­er that elders bless­ings work like mag­ic in life and I think every mar­ried wom­an wants long life with her life with her hus­band and love uncon­di­tion­al­ly …but the­se bless­ings are some­thing I don’t real­ly under­stand

  7. I don’t believe in aashir­vad.. Don’t give don’t take I.stead teach our kids to believe in them­selves..

  8. You have point­ed out some­thing which is glar­ing­ly there but sel­dom said, the soci­ety is and will always has been for and by males. It is for them and by them, it is going to take a lot if effort to actu­al­ly bring the changes but it is hap­pen­ing alow­ly and steadi­ly in the­se small ways which u point­ed out. Btw we are 3 sis­ters also ?

  9. You’ve artic­u­lat­ed your hon­est views in ask­ing per­ti­nent ques­tions that we, as a soci­ety, need to ask on the place of wom­en who must be given their due in soci­ety. Such reflec­tions must be encour­aged for it encour­ages debate on the truth. We need to grow as a soci­ety and accept the place earned by wom­en, Why should sac­ri­fice be made for some­body or patri­arch?

  10. Mama i loved it .. spe­cial­ly the bless­ing dif­fer­ence. i want more and more soci­ety to see this , how uncan­ny their meth­ods are. We share same thought , i wrote on Karwachau­th , have a look if you get time — wom­en are immor­tal .

  11. Haha… I actu­al­ly didn’t know about the Hin­du bless­ings. That was an eye open­er! I don’t keep Kar­va Chau­th or any fast for that mat­ter. Nor do we do any rit­u­als in our house. My hus­band and I decid­ed ear­lier on only that its not some­thing we wan­na teach our kids and regard­less of girl or boy, we raise them in a gen­der neu­tral house­hold.

  12. Very bold and thought pro­vok­ing post. Yes the ques­tions are yet to be answered. But I hope our tra­di­tion has the­se rit­u­als with some hid­den sci­en­tific rea­sons. But there are no one to explain its impor­tance to our gen­er­a­tion. Basi­cal­ly, mind is every­thing. What we think, we become. Stay blessed Ruchi.

  13. Even­tu­al­ly where ever Pos­si­ble come across more infor­ma­tion that is
    relat­ed to %BT%? The coach taught me to be for­mu­late a phrase essay regard­ing it issue.

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