Don’t Blame my SON

What a message? Have you got this on your Whatsapp? Have you seen it on your facebook timeline? Have you liked it, commented and shared? 

These few messages are floating on social media and people are liking it. As a mother of a beautiful daughter, I too like it but to be honest half part of it. 

Our honorable PM, Shri Narendra Modi motive “Beti Padhao Beti Bachao” is booming but he never said “Bete ko girao aur beti ko uthao” 

According to these messages, SON’s are definitely going to ruin your life so why to take care of them because at last all would be done by beti. 

Few points on which I HAVE AN OBJECTION BIG OBJECTION:

  1. DON’t judge upbringing: Parents or whosoever is floating this kind of messages., sorry to say but you are questioning yourself about your wrong upbringing. I received such messages from fathers of son- those fathers are also the son of someone, father of daughters – these are also the son of someone. By spreading such messages you are not only giving an example of how bad upbringing you are giving your KIDS and even you are somewhere making your parents feeling shame that this is upbringing we have given to our son. 
  2. DON’t judge my future: As a parent, I am giving my kids upbringing and I don’t know what my future will bring in my plate but this kind of message really doesn’t suit educated people to pass on or share on.
  3. DON’t judge on few unwanted SON in society: I have seen my dad giving his 100% to his parents, I have seen my father in law giving 100% to his parents, I have seen my male friends who give 100% to their parents and above all I see a great SON in my hubby who gives his 100% to his parents. 
  4. DON’t judge as there are old age homes: Yes, it’s still sad that there are many old age homes in the country and our senior citizen’s uncountable tears are speaking thousands of words. Is it really only because of some few SON these old age homes are open? Think twice !!! NO!!! it’s because of both SON and Daughter in laws… yes!!! the day daughter in law is ready to take up the responsibility of in laws as she wants her parents to be treated half of such old age homes will be shut down. Now from daughter in law I got a word daughter (remember she is the one whom as a father or mother we are praising above Son, I am not against this… check my OBJECTION NO: 5)
  5. Equality: We are in the 21st century and we talk about equality to women rights and equality for education and yes, we are providing which we should but it looks like to give equality and education to girl child we just try to degrade our SON to raise DAUGHTER. 
  6. DON’t MisUse Social Media: “You will reap what you sow” Don’t spread the wrong message to the world against Son that dreaming of the male child gets over. It sounds nice to hear that I want girl child but don’t do like when a male child is born you feel sad or bad. Utilize social media to create awareness about happiness and caring to feel in family rather creating differencing between boy and girl  
  7. STOP JUDGING MY SON: If these are points to judge my SON ..PLEASE STOP JUDGING HIM. 

I am proud daughter of my parents who always said and given me upbringing as a DAUGHTER only saying “You can also be on high position as any SON” but never said you are our SON not because they discriminate between two but they wanted me to understand what actually equality means and today I feel proud that if I have to help my mom after losing my dad I don’t think twice and if my in laws need anything I even don’t think twice and vice versa my hubby is equally taking responsibility of his parents and my mom so I am proud of him as he is Great SON and giving the same upbringing to his SON. 

DON’T BLAME MY SON

I would love to thank my co blogger – Snigdha who wiggle her beauty secrets on her blog called Beauty Obsessions

Follow her on FB, Twitter, and Instagram and enhance your beauty !!! 

Thanks a lot of babes for introducing me and having e along with you on this blog train 

Introducing next blogger “SHALU”
Read what Shalu Sharma has to say about Freedom to choose a career for women.

Shalu, who is a mother of 2.7-year-old twin daughters & an early education expert by profession, blogs at  TheDreamermum. Follow her on Instagram atTheDreamermum to read and know more her parenting & teaching journey.

#FightToFreedom #WomenFreedomFights #IndependenceDay #IndependenceDayIndia #JaiHind #BlogTrain #BlogToFreedom

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Ruchi Verma

Certified parenting teen practitioner, multiple Award winner, mother of two active kids believes in sharing the right source of information to readers which could help them in every possible way!!

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49 Comments

  1. Very well said Ruchie, I agreed. And what I feel, we dont really shout out for Beti bachao and kind of things. Firstly, there is no difference between a boy and a girl. All are equal and we have to believe that from inside.My experience telling me that when a girl is doing good and going high there are women who are actually pulling her down. So we need to change our mindset.

    1. Absolutely…time to speak up truth’

  2. Very well written.. I have often found myself cringing when I come across such posts on whatsapp… Yes, Promote girl child.. But not at the cost of putting down the boys…

    1. Absolutely!!

  3. Japesh Thyagarajan

    well said Ruchi. My parents have two sons – me and my brother , and we have a son each. It hurts to see people generalizing and degrading sons. I support equality and there should not be any difference between a boy or a girl specially during the childhood and such campaigns do precisely the opposite.

    1. I’m so glad to see ur comment Japesh ..it’s really necessary to stop this discrimination!!

  4. How very well said, no one reads or tries to understand in between the lines when the entire community is ONLY talking about daughters why snub SONS. lovely take on the prompt of Freedom.

    1. It’s high time n we should speak for it

  5. I am a mom of Son and daugh­ter. I can relate to the post. Yes Dont Judge. IF the sterotyp­i­cal nature which we are fol­low­ing. Love­ly post thanks for shar­ing.

    1. Thanks for liking n hopping here

  6. This is very well said! I think it is about equal­i­ty and not about this child or that one. I feel we must encour­age free­dom of bring­ing up chil­dren equal­ly, with the focus on prin­ci­ples and not the sex of the child.
    Inter­est­ing post — you have brought up such an impor­tant point.

    1. Thanks dearie

  7. Raised an impor­tant point through this post. My upbring­ing hap­pened just like you and i have two — 1 girl and 1 boy. I am try­ing my best to give each of them the inde­pen­dence they deserve and as you said dont blame any­one — son or daugh­ter.

    1. Exactly!!

  8. I so agree to all your points… Let kids be as they are without getting bias. This will surely give them a good upbringing and better understanding of freedom.

  9. I have a daughter and I totally agree with you. There must be equality, not snatching the privileges from boys and giving them to girls.

  10. I sincerely feel that it’s about time that someone spoke about this sensitive issue. I agree a girl child should be protected but not at the costs of ignoring a son

  11. You have nailed it Ruchie… I too got such messages on social media and it is truely weird… I have also a son and I think if we wellbring our kids in a proper manner, then their is nothing to blame in future… We should understand daughter and son both are equal ..
    Your post is truely a great initiative towards it… Thank you for sharing…

    1. Thanks for liking it!!

  12. Wow!! What a great post. I am at loss of words. I am a mother of a girl and a boy and totally related to every word you have written.

  13. How beau­ti­ful­ly you artic­u­late one’s though is incred­i­ble. I am absolute­ly in love with this top­ic, your Blog and ofcourse You.

    1. Hehe love u too

  14. O great ! This is exactly what I wanted to hear from you ? Thank you for the post ..well pended ????

  15. I know what you mean Ruchie. I too feel irritated when people who want to sound progressive but end up passing comments such as “You are lucky to be mother of daughters.” I would have been equally lucky had they been sons. When will this stereotyping the gender in kids stop?

  16. Well said …What girl and boy , both are our kids.
    Both are equal for me.Your post is tru­ely a great ini­tia­tive towards it.

  17. Interesting insights on parenting here. Glad to see this blog, Ruchi.

    1. Yes I agree to this that sons also need to be understood…thanks for choosing this post to read

  18. People have misunderstood the meaning of feminism and save daughters slogan… Equality of gender can only be achieved if both the genders are treated equally. Being a mom I resonate with your thought process.

  19. I am so glad someone spoke about this so openly and beautifully really appreciate this post keep up the great work

  20. That’s a lovely post Ruchi, being a mom of a son, I sometime feel that and can so relate to it. It’s high time we change the thought..

  21. This post is somehow related to me also as I am a mom of Son and daughter and I too believe in equality

  22. A perfect hard hitting post required by this society who thrive on the word “Judgement”. There are all kind of people in this world and you cannot create a benchmark due to someone else.

  23. By floating such messages we are deep rooting biases among children. Either the son will feel inferior or the daughter.

  24. I loved reading your thoughts Ruchie and you have rightly said don’t blame my son. we should look after all the factors which are needed for a change.

  25. Wow.. i so love this post. I have a daughter too and it is sad there is such a discrimination even in todays modern world but my daughter will surely be treated equal to any son!

  26. I absolutely second this post. It is off putting because a child is a child. And really rather than concluding things directly by reading a msg we all need to put some thinking to it as well.

  27. I totally agree with you Ruchie. Mindset of our society needs to be changed. Both son and daughter should be treated equally. Giving weightage to one gender is only pulling other down.

  28. Very well written Ruchie. Its a very delicate and sensitive matter . Mindset of our society needs to be changed and it starts from our homes. There are many families who give extra importance to one gender and are partial towards them. Great work x

  29. That’s the problem with the society! They cannot do anything without blaming one side! I am totally with you! It is our upbringing that shape us not our gender! A daughter is important, she deserves respect and love and Everything that a son deserves, that doesn’t mean a deserves less!

  30. Amazing and inspiring post. All are equal in the eye of the parents whether it is a boy or girl. Very thought provoking post. It binds the readers till the last. Great thoughts.

  31. I absolutely agree with this post, its an interesting read! Since I’ve been raised in a family where there was no discrimination between me and my brother, I can totally relate to this ! Such a good reiteration for me.

  32. what a beautiful piece that has been penned. the change starts with us and from our homes. if we can’t practice it in our homes, how can we expect that others will learn?

  33. I seriously salute you for coming up with this post. I have often found this sort of forwards from friends and detested those. Why to generalise like this? Yes girls require to be encouraged but no, not at the cost of putting down boys. And thats equality, the real essence of Feminism.

  34. This blog is well written. It is amazing and guess makes a lot of sense parenting. Blame game always do tend to happen but taking it on a positive note always matters.

  35. Human beings put their kids into a mold and make them believe that they are only suited for that specific role. That gender bias needs to stop. I believe that boys and girls are different beings and no comparison ever should be made.

  36. We should not judge anyone. No one is same. Even son’s can be as good as daughters. It is just human who need to be good from inside be it girl or boy.

  37. Such an inspiring post. Very smartly written it is a sensitive matter. Both girl and boy are equal.

  38. I totally agree with you. The role of the son is being over judge by our society.

  39. This is really a sensitive issue for the society. I saw many families who give extra importance to one gender ,this is eye opening for them

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